Friday, December 4, 2009
number 37
Maybe I am just looking out for them, but haven't there been a ton of hard liquor advertisements on television? Artest timed his confession well. He has to be getting some kind of cut.
Thursday, December 3, 2009
Back to my old ways part IV
Just... when I thought everything was finally getting back to normal. Woah nelly!!!
Saturday, November 21, 2009
Back to my old ways part III
Well, here it is. The mix I promised. Granted, it isn't my favorite mix. The songs don't slide into each other as much as I would like them to, but my friends are forgiving and hungry... mostly hungry. It's like Brianna said, "Yeah, I haven't really liked Spaghetti Facotry, but the last couple times I've been starving." This is no Maria Hines, but when you are starving at least you are getting Taps, right? Jo-king.
Friday, November 13, 2009
Back to my old ways
It has been awhile since I blogged. I've been procrastinating. I tell myself, "Oh I will blog more when I am reading much more consistently so that I will have many more insightful things to say." I admit this not as way of saying that I have been reading more, but as a praise for my friend's blog. I am always so impressed by what they write and how they write. That I tell myself that the only way I will be happy with my blogs is if I read more. I want to be a better person because of them.
I write this to say, I miss my friends. I miss being intellectually stimulated with every interaction. I feel as if I have lost my sense of humor. Seattle is not a funny place to live. Well, maybe it is. But not for my intents and purposes. I guess I am a small fish in a big pond. A big pond that is dark and murky and not dark and murky in a funny way, but the way the greeks meant it (shout out).
I almost bought an XBOX 360 the other day. Why? I'll tell you. So I could play freakin DJ hero. Yeah, I'm pretty lame right now.
I am accepting applications for girlfriends. Applications can be sent to my secretary Max Clark.
I write this to say, I miss my friends. I miss being intellectually stimulated with every interaction. I feel as if I have lost my sense of humor. Seattle is not a funny place to live. Well, maybe it is. But not for my intents and purposes. I guess I am a small fish in a big pond. A big pond that is dark and murky and not dark and murky in a funny way, but the way the greeks meant it (shout out).
I almost bought an XBOX 360 the other day. Why? I'll tell you. So I could play freakin DJ hero. Yeah, I'm pretty lame right now.
I am accepting applications for girlfriends. Applications can be sent to my secretary Max Clark.
Thursday, May 28, 2009
Thursday, April 9, 2009
The Great Northwesternly Migration
So today, my sister told me that she's thinking of moving to Seattle when she graduates in a year or two (she's crazily trying to graduate early I think). My brother has mentioned several times in the past month or so that if his full-time job at Oakley ever stops working out (it's the first one he's held that's lasted, he's enjoying himself a lot) that he'll be up here shortly thereafter.
Sweet. I created a Facebook group in honor of all the people who I plan on having join me in the Northwest. I'm really glad I moved up here. I can't help but keep telling family and friends in the Southernly direction how much I am in love. The cool, crisp air, the rare days of sunlight that make me sprint for the nearest park, the good people, and all the charm that I would describe but for that it is not the point of this blog post (if you'd like to see my thoughts on that stuff, check these out: I Love Sundays or Solo Adventures in Seattle).
Anyways, here it is folks, the official Facebook group of the Great Northwesternly Migration: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=70226053455
Sweet. I created a Facebook group in honor of all the people who I plan on having join me in the Northwest. I'm really glad I moved up here. I can't help but keep telling family and friends in the Southernly direction how much I am in love. The cool, crisp air, the rare days of sunlight that make me sprint for the nearest park, the good people, and all the charm that I would describe but for that it is not the point of this blog post (if you'd like to see my thoughts on that stuff, check these out: I Love Sundays or Solo Adventures in Seattle).
Anyways, here it is folks, the official Facebook group of the Great Northwesternly Migration: http://www.facebook.com/group.php?gid=70226053455
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
Psh, are you kidding me?
I attempted to write this reply on Josiah's wall, but it wouldn't fit after he so wittily wrote to me, "You'd better not be sleeping in my king size bed." cuz, I am so vain and long for people to, "look at me, look at me," I decided to post this blog. (Notice how I tried to "water down" my narcissism, by playing up that I am so vain.)
I'll have you know, sir, the bar has been raised. Let the dueling (banjos) begin!
Psh, are you kidding me? Well, let me preface that, "Psh are you kidding?" I was sleeping in your bed regularly. Shoot, I was spending most of my time in your bed. Isn't "in" when referring to your bed (specifically) funny? You have like one duvet. and when I am underneath that while on top of your bed I am actually "in" your bed. ...anyway back to my story, last Thursday I was doing the crossword puzzle while eating a bowl of lentil soup on your bed and spilt a bit of it onto it, now I took some of your dress shirts to sop up the soup broth and this worked. At least, I think it worked...
Three days later I came back home after a long day of worked, it smelled like a small rodent died in the house. After throwing up in my mouth a little. I tracked the smell back to your room. It seems that lentil soup smells like dead rodent if it sits! Anyway, I tried all types of cleaners; pine-sol, windex, bleach and ammonia (funny story about bleach and ammonia for another time and another day... let it be known that I have a headache that just won't go away, but I am well rested if that is a payoff)... speaking of won't go away, that smell was resilient... not only was that smell not gone, but you had this weird chemical smell that was just perched on your bed... or should I say "in" (lol).
I am persistent, but after trying to get that smell out for several hours it wasn't going away. So I asked Salvation Army if they would come pick it up (they said it was "cool, but I would have to throw in the [exterminate] colored fitted sheet.).
Funny thing, that smell was still in your room. I thought that I had a, "Cat in the Hat Comes Back" on my hands, until I checked inside your piano. There WAS a rodent inside your piano. I guess he/she had decided that he/she was going to tickle your ivories, until he/she died inside said piano that he/she was tickling. After throwing up a little from excitement of finding the epicenter of the smell (well, maybe it wasn't out of excitement, but the sheer intensity of the smell, I removed the rodent and live and let die another day.
So the, "Psh, are you kidding me?" makes more sense, huh? but given the information you now know, it would make more sense if I were to say, "Psh are you kidding me? I can't sleep in your bed because it is no longer in mine or your possession! Case A scenario: A family of four have been using it to and are eternally grateful for your charity work. Case B scenario A "family" (only in name) of four have been "using it" (storing drugs, guns, jugs magazine, etc... in it) and are "eternally grateful" (lets face it, couldn't care less) for your charity work."
I'll have you know, sir, the bar has been raised. Let the dueling (banjos) begin!
Psh, are you kidding me? Well, let me preface that, "Psh are you kidding?" I was sleeping in your bed regularly. Shoot, I was spending most of my time in your bed. Isn't "in" when referring to your bed (specifically) funny? You have like one duvet. and when I am underneath that while on top of your bed I am actually "in" your bed. ...anyway back to my story, last Thursday I was doing the crossword puzzle while eating a bowl of lentil soup on your bed and spilt a bit of it onto it, now I took some of your dress shirts to sop up the soup broth and this worked. At least, I think it worked...
Three days later I came back home after a long day of worked, it smelled like a small rodent died in the house. After throwing up in my mouth a little. I tracked the smell back to your room. It seems that lentil soup smells like dead rodent if it sits! Anyway, I tried all types of cleaners; pine-sol, windex, bleach and ammonia (funny story about bleach and ammonia for another time and another day... let it be known that I have a headache that just won't go away, but I am well rested if that is a payoff)... speaking of won't go away, that smell was resilient... not only was that smell not gone, but you had this weird chemical smell that was just perched on your bed... or should I say "in" (lol).
I am persistent, but after trying to get that smell out for several hours it wasn't going away. So I asked Salvation Army if they would come pick it up (they said it was "cool, but I would have to throw in the [exterminate] colored fitted sheet.).
Funny thing, that smell was still in your room. I thought that I had a, "Cat in the Hat Comes Back" on my hands, until I checked inside your piano. There WAS a rodent inside your piano. I guess he/she had decided that he/she was going to tickle your ivories, until he/she died inside said piano that he/she was tickling. After throwing up a little from excitement of finding the epicenter of the smell (well, maybe it wasn't out of excitement, but the sheer intensity of the smell, I removed the rodent and live and let die another day.
So the, "Psh, are you kidding me?" makes more sense, huh? but given the information you now know, it would make more sense if I were to say, "Psh are you kidding me? I can't sleep in your bed because it is no longer in mine or your possession! Case A scenario: A family of four have been using it to and are eternally grateful for your charity work. Case B scenario A "family" (only in name) of four have been "using it" (storing drugs, guns, jugs magazine, etc... in it) and are "eternally grateful" (lets face it, couldn't care less) for your charity work."
Saturday, February 7, 2009
I could watch this video without sound many times over.
Regardless of your feeling towards the band Tapes N Tapes, it's hard not to like this video.
Saturday, January 24, 2009
Not About Gameface
I enjoy working in an environment in which I am obsessive and anal about my work. One of the hotels I work, I am presented with challenges that allow me to be obsessive as well as anal. the challenge? Counting the till at the end of the night.
Pretty brainless task right? Well, yeah, it is a brainless task. So brainless that I start daydreaming while I'm counting the money. Invariably, I will lose track and have to start all over again. After several weeks of counting, daydreaming and then recounting, I decided enough was enough, I was tired of counting and then recounting money. I needed to make sacrifices and this meant putting on my gameface when I was counting the till. Sure, it would mean losing the chance to daydream about if I am getting enough fiber in my diet, how the Colts would be able to create more salary cap room or about girls, but it was all for the greater good.
Gameface
Gameface, what is it and where does it come from? I don't want to get into that nor do I really feel like answering your question.
The Greater Good
I have been on a mission to be able to count the till correctly the first time. What does that mean? It means, ringing up the correct amount of cash and having it equal X without having to do it a second time. I was well on my way to accomplishing this, even this evening! This Evening I began my challenge: I finished counting the roll of quarters; "three rolls of quarters, ah simple that's 30 dollars" and I was hitting the twenties; "One twenty? Ah, twenty dollars, simple." but my flippancy with such an attention demanding endeavor was my undoing. As soon as I entered that single twenty dollar into the machine, my eyes ever so casually, glanced down to see the twenty dollar bill that I had forgotten to count. Perfection = FAIL. Better luck next week.
I know I am close, so I have started to daydream about how I can continue challenging myself when I count the till. When I am a master, I will throw in style points, style points for how fast I am able count, if I am able to count while humming to a song, style points for carrying on a conversation while counting money... I am open to suggestions.
Pretty brainless task right? Well, yeah, it is a brainless task. So brainless that I start daydreaming while I'm counting the money. Invariably, I will lose track and have to start all over again. After several weeks of counting, daydreaming and then recounting, I decided enough was enough, I was tired of counting and then recounting money. I needed to make sacrifices and this meant putting on my gameface when I was counting the till. Sure, it would mean losing the chance to daydream about if I am getting enough fiber in my diet, how the Colts would be able to create more salary cap room or about girls, but it was all for the greater good.
Gameface
Gameface, what is it and where does it come from? I don't want to get into that nor do I really feel like answering your question.
The Greater Good
I have been on a mission to be able to count the till correctly the first time. What does that mean? It means, ringing up the correct amount of cash and having it equal X without having to do it a second time. I was well on my way to accomplishing this, even this evening! This Evening I began my challenge: I finished counting the roll of quarters; "three rolls of quarters, ah simple that's 30 dollars" and I was hitting the twenties; "One twenty? Ah, twenty dollars, simple." but my flippancy with such an attention demanding endeavor was my undoing. As soon as I entered that single twenty dollar into the machine, my eyes ever so casually, glanced down to see the twenty dollar bill that I had forgotten to count. Perfection = FAIL. Better luck next week.
I know I am close, so I have started to daydream about how I can continue challenging myself when I count the till. When I am a master, I will throw in style points, style points for how fast I am able count, if I am able to count while humming to a song, style points for carrying on a conversation while counting money... I am open to suggestions.
My Mother Shouldn't Know
I woke up late for work, which meant no shower. Okay.
I woke up late for work, which meant no breakfast. Okay.
I woke up late for work, which meant no cleaning up a little. Sorry Josiah.
I woke up late for work, no time to defrost ice caked windows. Uh Oh.
I woke up late for work, Had to drive the car with my head outside the window just to see where I was going so I would not crash into anything. Don't tell mom, or the Washington State Patrol.
Does this qualify me for the winter XGames? Tell Espn. Discuss.
I woke up late for work, which meant no breakfast. Okay.
I woke up late for work, which meant no cleaning up a little. Sorry Josiah.
I woke up late for work, no time to defrost ice caked windows. Uh Oh.
I woke up late for work, Had to drive the car with my head outside the window just to see where I was going so I would not crash into anything. Don't tell mom, or the Washington State Patrol.
Does this qualify me for the winter XGames? Tell Espn. Discuss.
Saturday, January 17, 2009
Daniel's Vision
Josiah: Um, I've decided that we should start a separate blog that's just, like, transcriptions of our conversations, separate from Letters from Santa's Village.
Daniel (in the background): Son of a [gun]! It's twenty dollars off. What did I do that was twenty dollars?
Josiah: Do you know what I'm saying?
Daniel: Yea, um, I don't know. I kind of like having transcriptions in there as well. You know, because, I mean, it's kind of like "I wonder what those crazy guys in Seattle are gonna do next." You know, like, "Is it going to be a choose-your-own-adventure? Is it going to be a transcription? Is it going to be a music review? Is it going to be a post? About a music video? Is it going to be, um, talking about some film that they just watched? and different arguments from either which way? Or is it going to be talking about fantasy football?"
Josiah: Obviously, that would be a Daniel post. *clears throat*
Daniel (absentmindedly): right... Why is this twenty.. ugh!...
Daniel (in the background): Son of a [gun]! It's twenty dollars off. What did I do that was twenty dollars?
Josiah: Do you know what I'm saying?
Daniel: Yea, um, I don't know. I kind of like having transcriptions in there as well. You know, because, I mean, it's kind of like "I wonder what those crazy guys in Seattle are gonna do next." You know, like, "Is it going to be a choose-your-own-adventure? Is it going to be a transcription? Is it going to be a music review? Is it going to be a post? About a music video? Is it going to be, um, talking about some film that they just watched? and different arguments from either which way? Or is it going to be talking about fantasy football?"
Josiah: Obviously, that would be a Daniel post. *clears throat*
Daniel (absentmindedly): right... Why is this twenty.. ugh!...
M&M's
At one of my hotel jobs, I have been given the liberty to listen to whatever music I want to. When I first started the job I was so happy to fill my Ipod up with tunes. I could not wait to get to work to put them tunes on... Fast forward to a day like today. My day today = Leprechaun. No thanks = Unicorn.
Leprechaun. YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO HEAR WHAT I DID TODAY. I woke up at 6 this morning took a shower, drank two glasses of water, woke up Josiah and went to the bus stop to hop on the bus. Got to work and put on my Ipod. I got a veggie sandwich and ate some M&M's. Everything is going as planned, and it is now 5:00. Would you like to know what is currently happening? Yes = Unicorn. No = Nessie.
Unicorn. It is now 5:00, and I've listened to Beach House's album (an excellent album) Devotion about 4 times through today. It's not a bad album, but I have listened to it four times already and the songs are all starting to sound the same. It sort of reminds me of this one time when I shared a dorm room with Ryan Johnson. Do you want to hear why it reminds me of when I shared a room with Ryan "No Muscles" Johnson. No Muscles = Griffin. No No Muscles = Abominable Snow Man.
Abominable Snow Man. I've gotten pretty tired of this Beach House album and now wish to remove my eardrums. All the songs sound the same to me. I no longer am thinking, "Oh good I can't wait until that one song comes on." I am thinking, "Boy, I am sitting here listening to the same album. Sort of reminds me of those M&M's I ate today." M&M's = Easter Bunny. No Thanks = Nessie.
Baby Bucko. YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO GO HERE?! I think this blog posting is meaningless to you. Why are you reading this? Do you even care about me, or our friendship or what a friendship with me would be like? This sort of reminds of that one time when you accidentally walked into that one public restroom of the opposite gender. Yeah, that was pretty embarrassing. To make matters worst you were at church or school or something. Everyone knew what you had done and you couldn't live it down. You used to wear a lot of Bugle Boy clothes and there was that one kid who started the chorus chanting, "Bugle Girl! Bugle Girl!" you were pretty sensitive and decided to tear all those labels off. Wait, this sounds a lot like something that happened to me. When it comes down to it you and I are quite similar, huh? THE END.
Nessie. It is true, I am pretty tired of the music. So I know what you are going to ask, "Why don't you go buy more music?" To be honest, I have spent a ton of money on music. My bus route goes right by Easy Street Records. My musical library has gotten plump and healthy and my checking account is thin and malnourished. I think I have found the cure = Big Foot. I don't care about a cure = Baby Bucko.
Big Foot. Andrew Bird. Sparingly though! I can see myself getting really sick of his whistling after awhile. THE END.
Griffin. When I shared a room with Ryan Johnson we liked to mix things up a bit. You know, setting Ryan's hair on fire, riding gokarts all day and then jumping of them while they are still moving and jumping over the fence, slashing campus safeties tires after consuming one's body weight in alcohol. Oh wait, that was all Ryan Johnson. I was a square when I hung out with Ryan Johnson, but I had one good idea. Good idea = Brontosaurus. Bad idea = Baby Bucko.
Brontosaurus. I had this one good idea of putting a song on repeat and see who could take it the longest. Actually, it wasn't my good idea. It was Jon's good idea, but I wanted to up the ante. I did so by making a pizza the wager. So the game was on, a pizza was on the line and the song we were to listen to? Yes = Major Tom. "No.... I know what happens!" = Godzilla.
Godzilla. So we listened to the song on repeat for days upon days. Days quickly became weeks. Sometimes we wouldn't notice the song. Other times it was all we could pay attention to. The song at certain parts would speed up faster out of control at other times it would slow to am absolute halt. In the end, neither of us lost our next door neighbor, the esteemed David Calvillo, lost. What had been happening during our journey with the singer slash songwriter is we had built up a tolerance towards the song. David, on the other hand, had not and so each time he would visit us, the singer slash songwriter would grate on his ears, but I don't think the guests at the hotel would put up with the music repetitiveness. Continue to Nessie.
Easter Bunny. I like M&M's especially while I am working, but I can only take only a few handful of M&M's then I get sick of them. Continue to Nessie.
Major Tom. David Bowie's Space Oddity. Still Interested = Godzilla. No thanks = Baby Bucko.
Leprechaun. YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO HEAR WHAT I DID TODAY. I woke up at 6 this morning took a shower, drank two glasses of water, woke up Josiah and went to the bus stop to hop on the bus. Got to work and put on my Ipod. I got a veggie sandwich and ate some M&M's. Everything is going as planned, and it is now 5:00. Would you like to know what is currently happening? Yes = Unicorn. No = Nessie.
Unicorn. It is now 5:00, and I've listened to Beach House's album (an excellent album) Devotion about 4 times through today. It's not a bad album, but I have listened to it four times already and the songs are all starting to sound the same. It sort of reminds me of this one time when I shared a dorm room with Ryan Johnson. Do you want to hear why it reminds me of when I shared a room with Ryan "No Muscles" Johnson. No Muscles = Griffin. No No Muscles = Abominable Snow Man.
Abominable Snow Man. I've gotten pretty tired of this Beach House album and now wish to remove my eardrums. All the songs sound the same to me. I no longer am thinking, "Oh good I can't wait until that one song comes on." I am thinking, "Boy, I am sitting here listening to the same album. Sort of reminds me of those M&M's I ate today." M&M's = Easter Bunny. No Thanks = Nessie.
Baby Bucko. YOU HAVE CHOSEN TO GO HERE?! I think this blog posting is meaningless to you. Why are you reading this? Do you even care about me, or our friendship or what a friendship with me would be like? This sort of reminds of that one time when you accidentally walked into that one public restroom of the opposite gender. Yeah, that was pretty embarrassing. To make matters worst you were at church or school or something. Everyone knew what you had done and you couldn't live it down. You used to wear a lot of Bugle Boy clothes and there was that one kid who started the chorus chanting, "Bugle Girl! Bugle Girl!" you were pretty sensitive and decided to tear all those labels off. Wait, this sounds a lot like something that happened to me. When it comes down to it you and I are quite similar, huh? THE END.
Nessie. It is true, I am pretty tired of the music. So I know what you are going to ask, "Why don't you go buy more music?" To be honest, I have spent a ton of money on music. My bus route goes right by Easy Street Records. My musical library has gotten plump and healthy and my checking account is thin and malnourished. I think I have found the cure = Big Foot. I don't care about a cure = Baby Bucko.
Big Foot. Andrew Bird. Sparingly though! I can see myself getting really sick of his whistling after awhile. THE END.
Griffin. When I shared a room with Ryan Johnson we liked to mix things up a bit. You know, setting Ryan's hair on fire, riding gokarts all day and then jumping of them while they are still moving and jumping over the fence, slashing campus safeties tires after consuming one's body weight in alcohol. Oh wait, that was all Ryan Johnson. I was a square when I hung out with Ryan Johnson, but I had one good idea. Good idea = Brontosaurus. Bad idea = Baby Bucko.
Brontosaurus. I had this one good idea of putting a song on repeat and see who could take it the longest. Actually, it wasn't my good idea. It was Jon's good idea, but I wanted to up the ante. I did so by making a pizza the wager. So the game was on, a pizza was on the line and the song we were to listen to? Yes = Major Tom. "No.... I know what happens!" = Godzilla.
Godzilla. So we listened to the song on repeat for days upon days. Days quickly became weeks. Sometimes we wouldn't notice the song. Other times it was all we could pay attention to. The song at certain parts would speed up faster out of control at other times it would slow to am absolute halt. In the end, neither of us lost our next door neighbor, the esteemed David Calvillo, lost. What had been happening during our journey with the singer slash songwriter is we had built up a tolerance towards the song. David, on the other hand, had not and so each time he would visit us, the singer slash songwriter would grate on his ears, but I don't think the guests at the hotel would put up with the music repetitiveness. Continue to Nessie.
Easter Bunny. I like M&M's especially while I am working, but I can only take only a few handful of M&M's then I get sick of them. Continue to Nessie.
Major Tom. David Bowie's Space Oddity. Still Interested = Godzilla. No thanks = Baby Bucko.
Tell me whether you think this is as genius as I do
So Daniel asked me to sweep and mop the floor (which I have the best of intentions of doing, btw) via the little dry erase board on our refrigerator. So I wrote back via dry erase:
"Daniel,
I will sweep and mop tomorrow.
- Josiah"
So I did not sweep and mop the day after I wrote the above, and Daniel asked me what's the dilly. Well Daniel, the note clearly states that I will sweep and mop tomorrow, so I plan on doing that tomorrow. Well after several days of the exact same sequence of query and response, I now know that I am the golden god of shirking household chores in the most honest of ways.
"Daniel,
I will sweep and mop tomorrow.
- Josiah"
So I did not sweep and mop the day after I wrote the above, and Daniel asked me what's the dilly. Well Daniel, the note clearly states that I will sweep and mop tomorrow, so I plan on doing that tomorrow. Well after several days of the exact same sequence of query and response, I now know that I am the golden god of shirking household chores in the most honest of ways.
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